In between start and end

Greetings from my work station. 

I decided to fill-up my time with a part-time job to earn some extra money. Everyday I'd found myself either sleeping or wasting my time in my room watching videos/ kdramas. I don't even study guys. I still am struggling with the whole study part of life even as a 3rd Year student in uni fml. 

This decision comes in pretty sudden to me. Well, I've been considering and mentally-telling myself I should get a part-time somewhere. But tbh, I didn't wanna do it in campus cos I'm scared I'll be meeting many of the people I know. I contemplated all this while thinking I could be free and do more things like take up more competitions to earn better money/prizes. Or upload contents on YouTube or work on my class more. In the end, I never did any of those things ever since the sem started. I've been much more productive while I was an intern to compare things with.

For one and a half semester now, my uni opened up this new business area which is currently only occupied by a few tenants. And one of them posted a job opening on FB. I decided to go for it. They pay me RM3/hour. Based on the other jobs in-campus, that is actually pretty decent. I mean I still have time typing this right now. That's how calm it can be.

Note: After this part, I had a few things to settle regarding the 'Talk Talk Korea 2018' prize shipped from Korea! (Will update about it soon.) Therefore, I ended up continue writing this post during the weekend instead.

Working in-campus does actually have its benefits. Everything is walking distance (only if your campus aren't that big). It probably takes me about 5 mins to reach the shop by feet. The only struggle is walking up and down the hill between my residential college and my workplace.

If you're asking me why am I working for such a small wage and when I don't really have to pay rent for staying in-campus, I'd say because I have big desires. I am always saving money but I always feel too scared to be spending them. It's such a huge guilt when I have a long list of the things I want to have and all of them cost me a bomb. 

It's not like I'm broke, I do take up loan and I do still have them. But it's barely enough. Let me just tell you a bit of what I am trying to achieve within the next couple of months.

1) Exchange programme

As a diploma student, this wasn't an offer I could even consider. Exchange programme are only meant for degree students and they can cost a lot. However, after this sem I am planning to continue my degree in the same university. Therefore, I will be eligible for this programme but my only and biggest concern right now is obviously the money. I am still not financially ready. RM10k? RM15k? RM100k? I don't even know how to budget exactly.

2) Camera

For now, my phone is actually more than enough to capture videos and pictures. But I always wanted a dedicated camera that can easily point and shoot. I did bought myself one when I was Form 1, I think. I spent RM400 on it and I thought it was what I wanted. But it wasn't. After finish collecting the money, I had the budget ready but I didn't know what are the specs I'm supposed to look at, and so I randomly picked up a camera that the salesperson recommended. It wasn't the best brand nor was it the best model. It was a big mistake.

The camera couldn't even shoot 1080p videos (phone cameras do it better). By now, the lens is already broken so the quality became worse. It is already time to find another one. Listing down the specs I'm now looking at;

i. Not a DSLR (portability reasons)

ii. Flip-screen

iii. Near-field Communication (NFC) for device sharing (kinda like using bluetooth but you transfer it by tapping your phone that has NFC with a camera that has it too)

Actually I already have the exact model in mind hehe. The camera budget is already as big as the budget for the phone I recently bought. You see the onion in my wallet now?

3) Emergency Fund savings

So I've been advised by many of the financial gurus I binge on YouTube, who made it seems like everybody NEEDS to have an Emergency Fund. It's for times you are forced to live without any financial support.

Basically, it's a step towards financial freedom too. When you want to leave a certain situation but the only thing that is stopping you is your finance, then this fund lets you have that escape option because you could basically survive without an income for a few months. That's why it is recommended that your Emergency Fund sums up to at least 6-months worth of living cost so you don't have to worry about it while you try to reorganize your life.

My aim for now is RM1k. I'm already half way there. Hopefully will reach my short-term goal soon, so I can set a new one lol.

4) Gold for mum

Hahaha this is so cringy to say... but it's one of my ultimate dream. Something I promised my mum too.

One day I wanted to buy her something gold with the thought that if one day she needed some extra money, she could just gadai it. I mean it can be an asset and it would increase in value (hopefully). However, it's not as easy as I thought. Because gold stuff actually involves zakat and all of this might burden her instead. I am still figuring out and considering what could be the ultimate gift for my mum if gold was not gonna be it. What else could increase in value? House? Hahaha lagi berzaman kot if this were to be it.

But I am dedicating my coins collection on this. I still don't know how much I have now, but both of my 50-cents coin box are more than half already and I hope it can at least be RM100 soon.

5) Masters

To just put it out there, I have the dream to continue my graduate studies oversea. So if for degree I could do exchange programme, I would have like a sneak peek before I fully include this in my consideration. However, degree would be the last stage of education where my parents are willing to support me for. So I have to start saving up for real if I want to continue Masters, especially if I want to do it somewhere oversea. Maybe start considering all the available scholarships too?

-------------------

That's about it for my wishes. Actually those are the ones that seemed "impossible" to me and more dream-like. Something that would come out of a bucket-list instead of a to-do list. But since I have a good amount of faith on myself, I will try my luck and pray for everything I wished for to come true. InsyaAllah. 

Dropping by,

Melynn.

I've always been different. And I've always known that.

People would tell me that I never seem to care about what others think. I've noticed that when puberty hits me... like having pimples all, what people say hardly comes at me. I've always been that person who takes things slow within my own pace. I don't do drastic changes. I have little to no care of the people around me (one of my concerns tbh). It's hard faking it when you really don't feel the slightest care for something. It's not that I didn't notice, it's that I don't care. I couldn't bring myself to care.

I don't care if you do things that won't concern me. And I don't wish everyone to be like me... but I kinda wish people weren't so busybody all the time. 

I let people go fairly easily. I never find myself too attached on anything. Not people, not idols, not items... they come and go so I've always anticipated it to disappear from  my life.

Actually penat tau when I don't want to care about smtg but people around me are constantly making me "worry" about it. Like if I wanna do smtg, I don't want to be asking permissions from friends. Telling them, yes. But getting approval is like a major friendship red light to me. Unless I ask you for it cos #indecisive.

I nak pergi concert, spend all my allowances on it... let me have my moments. I don't need a toxic person telling me I shouldn't. I don't force anyone to come with me. I don't menyusahkan orang by telling them at the last minute. I always plan early sbb I don't want people to think I am taking advantage on them. 

I don't get people who kecam others on this. I mean diff people value diff things. Like me, I don't care bout games, books or makeup like many people do, so I most likely won't be considering spending money on them as to me it is "membazir". But I'd pay more on things that I love like concerts and stationery. 

There was this one time, my younger brother bought a RM80 headphones. Before that, he would ask my dad to buy and he would use the RM10 ones from Gadget World. Then it would rosak not long after, and the cycle repeats lol. So when I saw him with his new expensive headphones, I questioned his decision. My elder brother did too. I told him that you can already get decent one if you only added RM10. Why would he spend so much when he can get a similar item that could be half times cheaper??

Then my mum said, "Biarlah dia nak beli headphone mahal pon. Duit dia. Dia tak persoalkan korg pon bila korg beli barang-barang mahal lain, kenapa korg nak persoalkan dia?".

That is all I needed to hear to drag me back to my senses. I didn't even ask him how long it took him to collect his money to afford that. It must've been hard bcos I was once I broke kid with lots of desire to buy unnecessary stuff too (still am!). But that's how we were taught to manage our own money.

I nak beli smtg that I like for someone else using my own money, let me be. I don't care if the person would like it or hate it. That's my least concern though kalau they suka, I would love them more lol. If I give someone a gift, most times I'll give you smtg I LOVE and that I wanna HAVE it for myself (stuff I don't usually have). So for someone to question my taste, what would you know.

Off-topic sikit.

Lately, I've been liking dusty pink. Don't get me wrong, my all time fav is still blue. But maybe bcos it has the slightly feminine feel to it and looks aesthetically pleasing. So I bought a new phone case... something I have been needing. My old case already had battlescars. 

So the new one is the 'rose gold' kinda pink. Actually kan, I lowkey liked the colour (and the tough design) but since pink wouldn't suit me I've always stayed away from it. The reason I bought this was only bcos it was selling for RM20 and I needed a new one. So hard to find a phone cover for my phone's model haih.

Dropping by,

Melynn.

For the past few months I was having a love-hate relationship with my new Samsung phone. I bought it in May 2018 so technically, it hasn't even been that long. I upgraded from a mid-range Asus phone to a Note series Samsung phone - which supposedly be a more high-end range. The reason of me purchasing this expensive phone (to me, it is) is because I wanted it to be long lasting... damage-proof, if possible. I not only wanted a pretty camera or a big enough storage or the latest version of OS with the biggest RAM and powerful processor... I wanted them all PLUS a stress-free usage. My old phone was stressful enough cos 1) it had extremely little storage space and 2) the battery dies too fast.

So when I bought the Samsung Galaxy Note FE. I had pretty high expectations. For those of you who don't know, Note FE is the refurbished version of the explosive Note 7 which had been discontinued. They used the unused parts of the phone and sell it under a different name. Therefore, it is one of the best phones by Samsung spec-wise but they are reselling it under a different name - Fan Edition (FE) with a much lower price point. 

Being from a good and well-known phone series, I didn't expect to face any issue within just few months of usage. Until one day, I found myself struggling to even reply my WhatsApp messages. The screen suddenly couldn't detect my taps like it used to. It kept on missing my touches and lead to inaccurate overall detection. I can't even slide my edge screen from the side - which I find to be one of the phone's handy feature!

I didn't have time (or the ability) to go to a Samsung store so soon. So I did like what most IT people are good at - troubleshoot. I searched up the problem and ways to solve them. I couldn't deny that there were solutions online but they still didn't do me justice. I only could think of it being a software issue since I didn't even drop my phone or caused any physical damage to it. The phone looked pretty unharmed. In the end, nothing succeeds. So onto the last resort!

Most websites mentioned at the end, if it still can't be fix even after all those formatting and app checking procedure... just send it for repair. I thought since it was still under warranty, I could get Samsung to fix it for free. 

Initially, I went to the Samsung store but I was told to go to the Service Center instead. That was last week back at home. Then yesterday, I went to the only Authorised Service Center available in Melaka which is at Aeon Bandaraya Melaka. Nasib dekat la jugak and I am already familiar with that mall.

They told me they could fix and return it within 3 hours. Same day?!? I was expecting a week worth of wait though. I even had my friend prepare her backup phone in case they are keeping mine for repair. They didn't ask for any proofs or documents like warranty card or anything like that. They just needed my phone. 

So when I came back to collect it, they replaced my LCD screen with a new one. Still wrapped in plastic. It felt new. They told me they'd formatted my phone, but I'm not sure if they did since all my apps like the placement and all are exactly how I left it. The only thing I needed to redo was the biometrics and passwords. The phone repair didn't cost me any money (bless warranty). But the financial damage of being in a mall was inevitable.

I was interested on extending my warranty since I've seen someone getting out of trouble because he purchased the extended warranty. 

I am highly considering it, in case things like this happen again without warning. I'm only allowed to extend it while my current warranty is still valid so that makes the deadline be before May 2019. Just putting it out there for future Amelynn.

The lady behind the counter did mention that if you are sending in for repair, make sure the inside seal have not yet been broken by an unauthorised third party since doing that may void the whole warranty coverage. So, only go to Samsung's Authorised Service Center! The service was indeed very pleasant for me but I hope to never have this kind of problem with my device again huhu.

Dropping by,

Melynn.

It has been a week since iKON and WINNER set foot in Malaysia and I have been missing them since. It is technically my third K-pop concert and the second group I've witnessed with my own pupils. Yet I still cannot tell if I was witnessing them live or just me jamming to them through the screens on my phone. I have a hard time differentiating that. Maybe because concert big screen exists hmm.

So I went to TWO concerts last weekend - iKON and WINNER's. I bought the best seating zone and got rockzone respectively. Honestly, I couldn't afford both concert tix and I was an iKONIC more than I am an INCLE so I just had to pay and secure my tix for iKON's #priority. 

But I couldn't ignore how much I love WINNER's music too. Though I didn't really watch much of their variety shows or music videos, I listened to their EVERYD4Y album A LOT. Sampai tak tengok lyric pon dah hafal and that's when I know I wanna see them live too. I had faith I'm gonna go for it.

Prior to the concert, Ka Mun and I have been trying our lucks for WINNER concert tix by joining most, if not all, giveaway contests organized by their sponsors. One thing I thanked the organiser - Macpiepro for is the courtesy for them to list down the sponsors for each concert for us. That made our contest search much more easier. TIPS: Follow the sponsors' social medias like FB and Instagram. They will usually post contests there few weeks before the concert!

All the contests that we joined are usually sharing posts but some do asked us to buy something. Like for OXY, they wanted us to purchase their product (no min value) and upload our receipts. Another one by epop Malay, they wanted us to get the entry form from their magazine. So those are basically the only ones I paid for. Others are like dining at Manhattan Fish Market a minimum of RM60 in a single receipt. Well, you get the idea.

Ka Mun won the OXY but she won only ONE blue zone tickets. FYI, blue zone is the cheapest zone. But since that was one of the contests which announced the winners early, we still had chance to try other latest contests. In the end we both won a pair from the media partner - Oh Hangat. There were like 20 winners listed and so Ka Mun and I expected either blue zone or green zone but to our surprise, they gave us TWO Inner Circle Zone (a.k.a the rockzone a.k.a the most expensive zone a.k.a the least expected one) each! We knew then... our lucks were the best for that week. They made the announcement on the day Ka Mun and I were at the event with BTOB's Sungjae pulak tu maigod.

About the event, let's just say we got lucky too. Tapi bad news for me, I accidentally deleted all of the pics and recordings that I took that day. Sob sob.

I ain't gonna say how the concert went, it was self-explanatory by looking at my posts on IG. But for the unpopular opinion, this concert is actually pretty well-organized. The security was okay. Quite fussy on the bag check procedure but it wasn't a major bummer. They almost took away my dad's binoculars that I brought with me, but thank God the chief security guy let me go. Almost had a verbal fight with one of them lol.

It didn't rain for both days when it's during the rainy seasons. Miracle or what?

I could enjoy the concert more because the place was small. They performed at Stadium Malawati, Shah Alam. I love small venues tbh. I could see the idols closer in real life. I got a lot of freebies for iKON since we came early. But for WINNER, we were late. 

The concert tickets had 50% off for Mcalls users so it was the only reason we could afford the best seating zone (after reselling our green zone tix). Glad we weren't tamak at first and get the more expensive zones because if not we would've had a harder time selling them off and getting our money worth. 

One of my concerns when going to a K-pop concert is the fact that we will have communication barrier during the ments, but little did I know iKON and WINNER didn't even need to use a translator! They spoke English so fluently with each other and even made jokes in a language I COULD ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND. Love that! 

iKON didn't talk much about Malaysian food or culture but they made it special by performing their latest songs! WINNER, on the other hand, talked about Malaysian food that they ordered on room service and both of them completes everything that I needed to hear. 

I made an LED banner for "Chanbin" and pretty sure the boys saw it. I saw Chanwoo waving at my way and I had it recorded (the quality was bad though). 

Last but not least, this all happened during my birthday weekend and everything became 100X more memorable. My close friends gave me presents and I got to celebrate it with my family after not being home for more than a month and had dinner at Seoul Garden. Ikha gave me a new purse and belanja me Big Bowl Ice (my first time!), Arep and Yumi gave me a drawing of me lol (#ilookedfat), Ka Mun gave me the official keychain merch of B.I (#merchareexpensive) and bought another B.I banner, Zarep gave me a Spongebob cap, Bad gave me a blue-striped socks and BTOB Sungjae gave me a BTOB album signed by him ON THE BIRTHDAY itself. Oh and Idris sang me a happy birthday song using Zarep's phone like they did for me last year... tak sempat rakam lagi sekali huhu. 

Anyhow,

BEST. BIRTHDAY. CELEBRATION. EVER!!!

P.S. All concert fancams (including me singing) is up on my IGTV (@amelynnhisham)... too embarassing to be posting on Youtube lol.

Dropping by,

Melynn.

Wow. I didn't blog in August at all.

August was basically just me and internship. 

All I could say is that 9-5 job really takes away my life. I didn't get much of me time at all. On the other hand, the company where I was interning at is probably the only place I've worked at WITHOUT any management issue. I've worked at a fast food, cafe and even as a promoter, so this is my first ever office life experience. I was expecting some kind of management problem since it's pretty common everywhere I go but here, I only had to stress about my own work. Not sure if it's because I'm a temporary worker but I'm glad they lived up to what their job advertisement claimed to be - work hard, play hard (read 'fun'). Don't know if I'd ever have amazing colleagues in the future like I did here.

Not gonna lie, my job is pretty boring. I guess because I was doing something that doesn't challenge me much. But I still did my best and had fun nevertheless. I had so many intern friends and we're all sekepala so it kills all the dullness.

I didn't have to worry about transportation, it's like a 10 mins drive from my house and a 45 mins ride on the public transport. In case you didn't know, I did the latter. Everyday in a week... now that's a  real challenge! I'm just glad I'm taking the LRT heading to Subang and not to KL, cos bruh KL morning traffic is da MVP of all challenges (even on the LRT)!

First week into my final sem and I can happily say I've completed my internship including dem reports and presentations, completely! Alhamdulillah~

The reason I couldn't blog during internship was because I was keeping myself busy with my own projects which mostly consists of video making, not that they're any good but just wanted to spend my sem break accomplishing what I palnned to, even if my weekdays are entirely in the office doing repetitive things.

But now that I'm in my 3rd year, I feel like this sem is gonna be the best one yet. I'm living off-campus, living cost has obviously increased but the people in my house have been really fun. I wish this would last forever...

My subjects have tremendously decreased. We're only taking 3 subjects and one Final Year Project (FYP) this sem. 2 of those are electives and my chosen subjects are pretty... dry (lol why do I choose to be like this?? #challenging #suicidalattempt), but they're software and robotic subjects so I'm feeling pumped because they sounded cool (cooler than networking, at least).

I talked and asked around my classmates for their chosen elective subjects and I got one question in return that initially wasn't in my mind, which was "Did you take it because it was easy to score?"

My thoughts on it? No, I didn't choose any subject because "it was easy to score". I know a lot of people think this way because we just wanna pass with good grades, so that our pointer will look good - that's all what students really want. But to me, I wanted more than that. 

What's the use of getting an A but not gaining anything else, versus getting a B or even a C, but you made a progress on yourself? Obviously if you're in your right mind would you choose having a progress. That's when it will really paves you somewhere. 

Why would you wanna be stuck in your early semester when you are physically on your final? Don't have the mindset of having "the easy way out", because you are just closing yourself to those bigger opportunities if you had just kept going harder.

I wanted my friends to know that those grades that I got, the one that you guys think I don't deserve... I just want you to know that it wasn't the grade that I'm aiming for. It was the sincerity and honesty that I put into each and every subject that I took up since my first semester here, that I wanted to be  proud of. I don't believe in cheating. I find that to be the most apologetic thing you can do to yourself. I worked hard to be in a class not to show people that I'm good. I be in a class and did what I did, because I feel like I could do better and I didn't want to end up like a loser, not in people's eyes but in my own. I learn to trust my own work more. Because why would you degrade yourself in a way people do to you? At least, you should be proud of your own work and accept the fact that the more things you need to fix, the more chances God is giving you. And that is what makes progress so fun. It's a cycle of learning and self-trust. Those who are willing to help you deserve yourself, should be the one you find, not the ones wanting you to throw your self-worth away.

At the end of the day, you are on your own. So whichever path you take, even if it ended in a dump, at least make it worth the ride.

To commemorate me who spent RM380 on another concert tix recently, I would like to share a little story. 

It's called "How I Fell in Love With iKON" hahaha. Just a story I would like to relive once I grow older honestly.

The name iKON had been around for sometime. I heard of them. I guess it was when they first came to Malaysia in 2016 for their SHOWTIME tour.

I had friends who liked them. Not wanting to feel left out, I tried giving their song a listen... thinking well maybe I could've fall for them too? So I listened to 'Bling Bling' and then tried out 'Rhythm Ta', but... I just wasn't hooked. 

I disliked their vibe, it was too angsty for me. But after watching one of their interviews, one member stood out from the rest. It was Bobby. He didn't look very appealing at first. So I thought, "Meh, they're just another hip hop boy group".

*Sings Team B's 'Just Another Boy'*

Fast-forward to few months back, their existence resurfaced when I first heard 'Love Scenario'. OK that song was probably their it song bcos I know for a fact a lot of people started joining the fandom since then. Well, Hanbin had been getting more recognition ever since. #PROUDMUMMA *flick away tears*

So after hearing that song, 'Rubber Band' came along and hohoho the dark hole just grew 10X bigger, sucking all dem fangirl side in me! 

Watched their music shows and dance covers of those two songs. After a while, YouTube started recommending more and more of their content and I happened to click on their fanmade "funny moments" video. One after another, I noticed a lot of the clips were taken during their pre-debut era. It was when they were in those survival shows.

I started looking up for their songs in the show "Who Is Next: WIN" and the first one I listened to was 'Climax'. I didn't know what to expect. Later did I realised... I was tearing up. You should know, it's not easy to move people's emotions at a live stage with hundreds of people watching you. But these boys, who at that time were just trainees, did.

I didn't know much about them at that time, but hear me out when I say I can deeply feel their desperation and sincerity on what they're doing, through that song alone (which was also self-written by them).

Then after I found out they lost to Winner (Team A), it got me curious on why they DIDN'T WIN?!

From there I started watching "WIN" and honestly, I was stanning Team B (a.k.a iKON without Chanwoo) the whole time and was disappointed that they really didn't win. Their performances got such great response from the judges compared to Team A, it was almost impossible for them not to win in my opinion. I didn't have anything against Team A. I know that they tried just as hard, but still my heart wasn't convinced. I guess, the fans were. Or like some said, it was just part of YG's marketing strategy.

And you thought my curiousity would end there, noooo... I have never seen an idol being so transparent *looks at B.I* and someone so determined on something from a young age until who is now around my age. So I wanted to see more of them, that's why I started watching "Mix and Match".

Through that show, I see everyone who was in Team B just burning with the passion to win. After all, it was their second chance (after WIN) to proof themselves. Seeing them getting burn out from practicing everyday in the wee hours made me realise how hard they actually work.

Ultimately, I was inspired by the man called Hanbin (B.I). He was the leader and had qualities that not everyone possess - choreograph dances, compose music, writing lyrics while looking after the other members. He does everything and he's good at it. However, pressure never stops from trying to get him.

With the additional 3 members on top of the 6 original members to compete with, I find it to be so cruel of YG but at the same time so clever of him. Clearly, it was not easy for everyone especially B.I. Yet one thing that amazes me is how in that show, B.I's team always ended up winning after every judging. Like you can never see him lose... I was practically praying to see him lose at least once. It's impressive that no matter who is under his care, he will somehow bring the good out of them. His ability to match different member's needs is a wow factor for me. Truly reflects just how thoughtful of a person he is.

Not saying Bobby's and Jinhwan's teams are bad, in fact they couldn't have done any better, but it was obvious then, why B.I was their leader.

Also compared to during "WIN", Team B had B.I as their leader despite them being the younger group while for Team A, YG had to make the decision during the show itself. Not saying they aren't competent (Seungyoon and Mino are GREAT), but instead just see how incredible B.I is.

Oddly enough, after me marathoning their survival programs which actually ended on 2015 when they debut. The 2018 me was blessed with another news - "iKON TV". I wasn't a YG stan so I didn't know all the previous groups had their own 'TV' but merely the fact that I will get a weekly update after just founding out about them already made me beyond THRILLED! I didn't even have to wait, I was already late lol.

iKON TV has brought a new image of them because they seemed more relax. But can't deny the fact B.I is still as hardworking as ever (when will I ever be like that). Within that short period of time, I fell in love with all 7 of them. It started from Donghyuk but ended with ChanBin.

Then not long after iKON TV, their summer variety show called "Summertime" came into picture. I wonder how their schedule is like... they're already so busy as it is!

Bringing up the reason for this post is because roughly a month ago, YG announced iKON's next WORLD TOUR and guess what? Malaysia pon ada!! Macam tahu-tahu je YG. And few weeks ago, I bought a ticket to their concert here in Kuala Lumpur huhuhu I so hepi, but my bank account aren't.

Even though the system was very inconvenient and my payment card was rejected like 10 times (God knows why TicketCharge is like dis), a junior's friend managed to successfully secure our tickets! Thank God!

To sum up this whole post, iKON is like my current motivation plus entertainment... like who can resist their variety mess? And B.I will always be pabo Hanbin, who shall never stop pabo-ing and I shall love him anyway.

Sooo that's the end of my ramble. I shall see you in my iKONTINUE tour blog post soon (insyaAllah). Kbye.

Dropping by,

Melynn.

2016.

The year I went to my first KPop concert. And that happened about 2 years after stanning EXO. At that time, it was EXO'luXion.

Greetings from an office girl who's eating her tuna sandwich when everybody's out for lunch. Hashtag takretisocial.

Started my first day of intern the day before before yesterday (25/6) and today's the fourth. Fun fun fun. No. Well the place is nice. Small but not too boring. A different environment. Everyone here mostly brings own laptops. It's a non-bumiputera company meaning many of them aren't Malay. Malay is such a minority that the surau is literally made up of 2 cupboards forming an 'L-shape' against the wall just so it can fit a sejadah. Told my mum bout it and she told me, "Kira baik lagi la ada 'surau' kat your kind of company. Most companies like that takde pun surau tau."

K ma.

They have a pantry. Got oven, fridge, coffee machine and all we can take for free. Haa makan la makan banyak-banyak time kerja. Pastu jangan gi tandas asyik buang air jerr *points finger at self*.

Gladly, they have a lot of interns here... surprisingly. It's a small company so all departments are basically breathing the same air. But the place isn't square so we can't really observe everyone. There is a girl I like to look at though. She is a graphic design intern and like my graphic designer friend, her vibes is truly similar. The way she dress, the fact she owns a Macbook and a Kanken and just her presence in general. I'm just interested on how graphic designers work... It seems really cool.

Unlike me, an IT-but-soon-to-be-a-marketing intern who have to perform data entry and be a true office worker. I like the fact I get to run away from coding and the IT part I used to see a lot in uni. I get to learn marketing stuff now. Very interesting in my perspective. Yea ofc I would like to learn more on coding but tbh, I kinda wanna take that slow and not hurt my pea brain so much during this 10 weeks of my sem break.

On the bright side, I get to do lots and lots of research which is also what I am good at. My whole experience of landing the job was to do exactly that anyway. Customising each and every resume to fit the applied company and later learning about them for the interview. Sokay gurl, I got this.

Also, knowing more about the platforms this company use and at the same time be more knowledgeable in the current technological growth. My supervisor is fairly nice but she is always busy so she asked another person to handle me whenever she couldn't. So technically I got 2 supervisors, which can be confusing at first since I have to ensure both parties are aware of what I'm doing.

Everything else is nice. So far, I like this kind of working life. Definitely different from my other part time jobs which require loads of labour work and social interaction smh. 

I'm now stressing on a little bit of researching and calling people up, but still fairly simple tasks. Next week I'll be shifting to other more research task so hopefully it gets interesting. Also, I was told my company is having a campaign in August and since I'll be here til then who knows maybe I'll also be involved in a REAL office project?! Later, if it turns out great I can include it in my resume as well... maybe? Hopefully, insyaAllah.

Dropping by,

Melynn.

On an end note, here's a toilet notice I read after dropping my bomb in that particular toilet.

Greetings from my hospital bed.

Note: I started writing this post the night I got admitted, but got lazy to finish the post right after so I ended continuing it much later.

Let me just explain briefly on what happened to me recently. Initially, I was probably in the same situation as few of those people who's immune system deteriorate over the last teenage years... I got sick. It started with the usual fever and just the feeling of dying. I didn't wanna get out of bed, but that happens all the time so I assumed it was not a big deal.

3 days before my first final paper - the 28th of May, I came home from our 3am study session with a sudden ear disturbance. Since I've spent the whole night "studying" at my faculty, I was ready to sleep when I got home. But I couldn't. My fever spiked up that morning but that wasn't the worse case, I woke up with a sudden (and horrible) ear pain. The pain was no joke. It literally felt like a stone was pushed into my ear. Rolled on the bed like mad, balled my eyes out until I cannot anymore, Google search and only to find people who can relate to my pain on YouTube yet gave advices I couldn't use, asked my housemates for tea tree oil since people on the internet told me it would work but no one had it so boohoo, placed a heating pad on my ear to shift the pain onto the heat and those are just the few struggles from a bird's eye view.

Sometime around noon, my ears suddenly excrete what happened to be blood. So I ended up with a bloody ear. Ok probably not that extreme, there was blood but slightly watery. Then a real bad headache followed. You know the feeling of seeing the world spinning? Yeah exactly that feeling suffering.

Cut to the chase, I went to the clinic and was prescribed some antibiotic and paracetamol along with an ear drop. Shoutout to Ikha and Yumi for going through all that trouble finding a clinic and sticking through (I know you read this Yuan Min). I just needed to survive the finals week with those prescription before I get a proper checkup at a hospital in my home state.

Finals went by pretty unharmed, though I had trouble listening when people are on my right side talking (since the pain is in my right ear) and whenever someone talks through a microphone, I wished people could just skip the announcements altogether. It was that bothersome. Other than that, no further pain was encountered. Alhamdulillah.

I reached home, told my parents everything I went through in detail and the next day my mum booked a hospital appointment for me. Since we suspected it was an ear infection, going to a physician won't settle things and it was definitely meant for a specialist consultation. Previously, I actually had an ear infection back in 2012. Coincidentally, my mum found the same doctor who did the procedure for my ear back then as she was booking for an appointment in a different hospital. It was like deja-vu. Just in a different time, at a different place.

That doctor told me I had a mucus in my middle ear and it's currently stuck so it couldn't get out the natural way. That thing isn't hardened, it just remain sticky inside. People call it 'glue ear'. Technically, it is behind my eardrum and that was what caused my slight deafness. We found out I had about 30% hearing loss on my right ear because of this (after going through some tests). Usually caused by flu and when it is not treated properly it could end up in the ear since the canals are pretty much connected with the nose. It is more common in children. The doctor said 5% of children usually get this and lol guys, I'm practically called a child.

Also,

Wrong body ke apa /sweat

I ended up agreeing to do a simple procedure of inserting what the doctor called 'gromet' which basically is a tiny hole that allows additional air to aid with the ventilation inside my ear. I got myself admitted due to some circumstances but most of the time, this procedure don't even need the patient to go through admission and could just go under daycare. 

Anyhow, I did get admitted. And let me tell you, this hospital is lowkey a hotel. It's a private hospital currently known as Avisena Specialist Hospital, but previously known as Darul Ehsan Medical Centre (DEMC). From the front desk to the hospital room, yo this place is really out of the usual. They got a freaking bell boy to bring us to the room. How fancy is that?

Not to mention, they're very Muslim-friendly and have one of the best hospital services I've ever seen. The costs too are pretty reasonable for a private service.

The procedure went well and I'm still currently on medication - some pills, ear drop and nasal spray. But I'm all good. My ear is getting better. I am able to hear close to my normal hearing. I still hear some echos but I'm pretty sure it'll get better.

Throughout this whole experience, I honestly had that "I think I'm going deaf" thought. I thought that I might need a hearing aid for real. And maybe put all my sign language knowledge to good use lol.

Due to this, I actually got a gist of what hearing loss felt like and it happened to be very annoying. Imagine able to clearly see someone talking right in front of me but I could barely hear what that person says, then constantly having to ask them to repeat. That really annoys me just as much on top of feeling really sorry. Plus, noises tend to sound louder. Like the noises really overpower the entire space so I hate noisy people even more because of it. Though aku pun bising gak sebenarnya.

That pretty much sums up my whole experience. Stay healthy people. Hospital bills aren't cheap!