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It's been awhile since I wrote something on here. And by that I mean, storytelling-wise. On this year Ramadhan, I feel like I shouldn't be saying too much of useless things that I would usually rant whenever I have the chance to. I want to make sure that every word I say meant something good to others especially something I am addressing to publicly like in this blog. 

A glimpse of my university's Masjid from my faculty.

Note: This little sharing isn't just directed to Muslims.


This morning, I just finished reciting a surah from the Quran that truly captures my heart and that I could relate myself with to a certain level. Now let me share to you about what Allah has said in a surah named al-Qasas meaning 'The Stories'. Basically, it's a story about Nabi Musa a.s. and the ruler of Egypt at his time - Firaun. 

Along the line of the story of Musa, Allah mentioned something about wealth. In this world, as a Muslim we don't only seek for the pleasure of this mortal life, we should believe that our real lives start from the afterlife. Allah has been giving us plenty of favours more than we could think of. 

In those many favours, you and I don't all get the same amount for one of each. Our lives vary on a certain scale and so is the blessings we receive. What we have now is a test. A test on our faith... on our actions towards what we are given. Sometimes the more you receive, the greedier you'd get. We don't see these things upfront but when Allah limits certain favour onto you, He knows more than you do.

Let's take a character in this surah named Qarun as a reference. He is a low-level citizen but he makes a money out of rebelling on his people. Then he would show-off his wealth by saying that his knowledge is the reason for all that he has to make others jealous. In the Quran, it is stated that people who also seek for worldly pleasures admires his wealth, but NOT the knowledgeable ones. Qarun is stupid for not realising there is a whole generation of people that Allah destroyed for doing what he did. And due to his excessive pride, Allah made him get sucked by the land like how Firaun get drowned by the sea.

Ok hopefully what I am about to say won't offend anyone. But we Muslims for a fact know that Heaven is meant for us. Only our deeds will decide when can we enter Heaven; it could be right away or it could be that we needed to be 'cleaned' with the hellfire first. Non-muslims or those who turn away from the truth that the Prophet brings, better known in the Quran as Kafir, is meant to be forever in Hell. My point is the difference in favours among the Muslims and Kafir through our eyes. It is mentioned in the Quran that the Kafir will receive all the good things this world could offer. Everything that they ever wanted - wealth, positions, fame, look, etc. but surely, He is The Justice. This world wouldn't lasts. Their joyful life will end here in our mortal world, but Muslims we strive for a better Hereafter - this worth more than what we see in dunya now. So the next time you envy others, take a look back at yourself. What have we been doing to deserve the Heaven? 

Now, what I like in the surah is a phrase where Jews and Christians admitting that we are all born as Muslims (verse 53, surah al-Qasas). Allah has showed us guidance in this worldly life where Judgement Day will happen and that Hereafter exists through the words in Quran. He sent out Messengers and Prophets to teach and preach so that we don't get sidetracked, but many refuse to follow. Even generations before us. At the end of the day besides our faith, our deeds will also be taken into account. Thus, the two variables that differentiate you and me.


With that, may Allah accepts all our deeds and repentance. Assalammualaikum.


Dropping by,
Melynn.
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I didn't get what I hoped I did,
The one I've lost since earlier this week,
The coldness that heavily suffocates,
The atmosphere no one would want to duplicate,
An act of suppression and anger mismanagement,
Is one that mostly being strengthen instead.

Feeling tired of getting mad,
Feeling tired of crying to bed,
It definitely isn't healthy no matter how I see it,
Confronting may seems easy,
But for me, I am running out of 'pity',
Wasting that emotion and time I don't ever favour,
Really isn't how I plan to continue with this suffer.

So I gladly turned ignorant,
My days were spent unusually silent,
How much keeping up had drained my emotions,
Go ahead and look around pretending we are loners,
Thinking that is awkward seems better,
Rather than creating another one of our inner actor.

Our ultimate solace.
Marhaban ya Ramadhan. Let's try to be a better version of ourselves and reflect more on our faith towards our Lover, our Creator - Allah Azza wa Jalla.


Dropping by,
Melynn.
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After SPM, for the most part it's either you know damn vivid where you see yourself in the future in or out of study, or maybe you already have the choices set up and just needed some extra thoughts to decide, or you're probably still blank and simply yolo-ing... Either one still sounds pretty normal.

Last year, I really wanted to take up Diploma for some reason (mostly bcos my mum urged me to). A little late during UPU application was when I decided that IT would be my go-to course. It was seriously hard to decide since I'm a pure science student and have no basic IT. On the other hand, many of my friends ended up being either in Form 6, foundation (asasi) or even mariculation (matriks). My thoughts when I knew less to none of them are taking diploma like me, it took me some time to ensure my own self that I was making the right choice.

A year later is when I truly regret nothing about it. My SPM results were decent - 5As, and no UiTM was chosen for my UPU form. Reason being is that I don't wanna sound racist, but moving onto a place of only having one ethnicity - Malays, sounded pretty dull to me. And tbh, I see UiTM lower than any other public universities (IPTA) but at the same time higher considering the many campuses they have nationwide. So yeah UiTM sounded meh to me.

Now, I didn't mind living apart from my family, but it helps that I am living only 2 states away. This would be something you gotta consider in a long run bcos things are just gonna be more convenient sometimes yknow. Me as I'm typing this on a non-holiday weekend in my bedroom... And you probably wanna ask yourself, would you prefer the same school-like settings or a different more adult-ish settings? This could aid in making that decision if you're thinking of going to college or university.

Now, mindsets. Many is still unaware of the good thing about being in Diploma. Correct me if I'm wrong, but people presume diploma kids are dumb. At least worse than the other options. I think simply bcos it takes up 3 years to be done with. Compared to foundation, matrics or STPM, which takes up max 2 years. But keep this in mind, when you take diploma (the same goes for polytechnic is what I've heard of), there's credit transfer. That means some credit hours during your 3 years will be transferred when you pursue degree. And this will save up possibly 2 years of your time. As soon as you enter degree, you can move up being a 2nd year instead of the 1st unlike the rest of the new batch. In the end of the day, doesn't matter where you start, it would still at least take 5 or 6 years to complete degree INCLUDING whatever course you take before you apply for degree. Simply said, sama je.

Since diploma courses are much more in-depth and covers a lot more, it's great for those who wanted to have their options open to see which major would suits you best in degree. Learning more would help it better in deciding the best career path. And I've heard sooo much that the things you learnt in foundation, matrics or STPM covers a minority part of your degree later on. What you've been taught there is basically the surface of what degree actually is. I've also heard that you would barely make use of the things you cramped up for a year or two in all the other options during degree. So, might as well take time to learn the actual core of your course to have a better insight of it like what diploma does.

Besides, diploma is considered a very chill course. There's plenty of free time to manage so you can always go thorough with your study materials whenever you feel like it. But don't expect to stay rajin all the time la haa. The timetable for me personally, have plenty of free time. This would differ depending on your course but diploma in IT doesn't have that much of hardcore subjects (yet...maybe?) and they're still manageable, if you ask me. It's also a fun course bcos you'd learn all kinds of coding that you would deal with all the time on your computer. Not to mention complicated too.


All in all, I hope this post isn't biased. Jk, it is so biased that I'm like tryna brainwash all of ya'll minds right now hahah.


Dropping by,
Melynn.
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Yes I'm mad,
At how you're mad at me,
For you expected me to say,
When I'm expecting you to ask,
How thoughtless I could've been,
If I only come begging to you first.

It has been since forever that phrases like "Don't let others define you" or "No one else should matter" had been flooding our mindsets. But I hate it. I simply hate how much I still doubt the truth of it no matter how hard I try to deny. Believe it or not, some part of us still stubbornly wants to listen to others. Care for what they say more than our own words. I say this bcos.... same.

You are my only resource,
Everything I have is from what you gave,
How much I eat,
Doesn't depend on what I crave.

Have you ever been in a situation where you tried so hard to keep yourself tight on a budget while waiting for your next allowance, but the money just doesn't come? Well... I have. At first I felt bad for asking, so I kept it silent and endure it just a little longer. For awhile, I refused whenever my friends ask to hang out. I give all sorts of excuses just so that it doesn't seem like I couldn't afford but only bcos I didn't want to. I wish I didn't have to. 

Til when I know that if I didn't bring it up, this will just never get resolved. But when I called up to ask, it made me seem like a useless child to only call for money. I never used to phone call anyone. Unless it's for a reason, but the reason will always makes me seem like the thoughtless person. No matter how hard I think, it's my rights. Weekly allowances should only last me a week... no? 

I restrained,
I refrained,
This ain't longer about what I wanted,
My needs also felt like they're being affected,
I've been very considerate,
Even when no one ever do the same,
Is this really how things are gonna change?


Dropping by,
Melynn.
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Let me be honest here,
I'm not too fond of having you as my lecturer, 
I cursed at you more than I usually do,
I said mean things behind your back,
The fact is I admit all what I've done,
But never once I'd like to take it all back,
It's really is wrong,
What you did were all wrong.

You came late without any apology,
You've been cancelling classes on the spot too frequently,
You love last minute things and never once felt sorry,
We all know and get it that you're busy,
Even more aware of your irresponsibility,
But you should take your students more seriously,
Some are eager to learn and gain something out of you,
How could we possibly do when you yourself don't even want to?

By far, you never show any better side to be praised,
Don't you ever wanna be respected?
If all you do is slack,
Don't even dream of getting that respect or even any raise (tbh),
Try to at least explain yourself,
Though I think it would simply be worthless,
All there are the lies you piled up,
And the excuses you 'inevitably' made up.

I'm sorry ahead of time for all that I said,
Truthfully, your teachings aren't really bad,
If only you could work on that selfish act,
Have a little bit of self-reflect and some guilt will do, 
I'm sure less sin will be placed upon us two.


A poem about the things I wish my lecturer knew. What a headache he's been given me.


Dropping by,
Melynn.
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Has the thought ever occur,
That behind every little whine,
Every ungratefulness or dissatisfaction,
All that we find somewhat burdensome,
Supposedly someone out there,
Is craving for the matter we plead to disown.

A slight change for them,
Could opt for a wider smile,
Thinking what we had may not be what we want,
We're hoping for what's more to come,
Until we realise the goodness that's been seeping along,
Hidden in every sigh that ever formed,
Every 'ugh' and all the 'ahh',
Doesn't necessarily end in misery,
Should we remain focus on every positivity.

There's nothing wrong with expressing your mind,
Saying what you like isn't a despicable sign,
If a little birdy fly over and speak its mind,
Hear them and possibly with all ears lended,
Imagine being in someone else's shoe,
Understanding and reliving in others point of view,
When it gets harder to relate the matters personally,
Is when you gotta start accepting your own reality,
That it's not only you who got some issue,
Others may even feeling it worse, who could possibly knew?


A poem of a friend wishing for something I've been complaining about. I should really feel more grateful.


Dropping by,
Melynn.

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About me


Aye! The name's Amelynn.

98 liner and a sucker for kpop & kdramas. I write as I think. Hope you're able to gain something from me ❤️️

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