Creating My Own Pace
We all worry about the unknown - our future. All of us are trying to be a better version of ourselves but nobody tells us that it doesn't have to happen now. That it doesn't need to happen immediately.
I always find myself worrying about next year or the next 5 years or the next decade of my life... then I wonder, I'm not gonna go anywhere in life if I screw up the present. But honestly, the present is a bit too overwhelming if I put too much thought on it. What's closer ahead is actually scarier than the unknown. It's like I'm only giving myself Plan A options.
Do you realise that a lot of the videos that people do are always 'Things I wish to tell my 20 year old self', 'Mistakes in my 30s' and so on and so forth. Funny that there's none for the people at 40s and 50s. Is it because our generation aren't there yet? Or is it because young people are obsessed with always being on the right track?
Have you ever wondered why people watch those kinds of videos? It's because we tend to make sure that we're avoiding mistakes other people do to "save" our time. We worry too much about living a perfect life where everything is sorted out for us.
I'm gonna sound hypocritical because honestly, that's what I do too. I have lots of future plans. I wanna move out and live in a studio apartment closer to my workplace wherever that may be. I wanna keep living frugally and practice sustainable living - which will probably be more within my control if I'm living by myself. I don't plan to marry so soon anymore so I'm gonna focus on my career goals first.
BUT now I realise that I don't have to make it happen immediately. Those videos that mentioned 20s and 30s in their title should not be MY definite timeline. I kinda agree when people say "When you're in your 20s and you make mistake, nobody is gonna scold you because you're still a kid". I personally think the younger you are, the more mistakes you should make cos that's the best way to learn. However, putting a time limit on the mistakes made, is just wrong. Life is all about learning... being young may be a good excuse to do a mistake but shouldn't always be. As long as you're living, the mistake you do at 40 isn't any worse than the same mistake other people do in their 20. We just live different lifestyle and environment. The only takeaway is that we're learning from it despite our age.
More people, including myself, need to be okay with having our own pace. Whether that means we're a little slow or a little fast, it's better to enjoy life as it is. I wanna stop beating myself up and think I'm falling behind every time I take a break. Honestly, if that is what I need and that is what's best for me, I don't wanna rush. I'm tired of always needing to be "doing a lot". At times, I just wanna do mundane things like learning a new recipe or updating my journals or work on useless things that makes me happy. Sad that these are too boring and less impressive by people's standards.
With that, I'm leaving you with few of the quotes from a collection of kdramas I've watched before that I think very wise to learn from.
"Aging is wonderful because you get wiser."
- Madeleine L-Engle (When The Weather is Fine)
"I believe life is a process of dreaming. It isn't important what your dreams are, and it doesn't matter if you're not able to make that dream come true. The important thing is are you dreaming right now? You're still finding your dreams? That is still a process of dreaming."
- Rich Man
"There are no such people as "those who are prepared".
There are only those who work up their courage to try."
- The Best Ending (web drama)
"Not (be) someone who leads people to the right path,
but be someone on the edge of the wrong path."
- The King: Eternal Monarch
"There's two types of people in this world. People who fall on top of a fragrant flowery path even when they trip themselves.
People who fall into stinking sewer and struggle in the water."
- I Wanna Hear Your Song
"Happy families are all alike.
Every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."
- Anna Karenina (Miss Hammurabi)
"Books on psychology all say that people remember the problems they haven't solved yet,
but forget about what they've accomplished."
- Miss Hammurabi
"In front of death, every past moment
is the climax of your life."
- About Time
"The difference in me and them isn't our intelligence.
It's in our focus and strength."
- Love O2O (Chinese drama)
"Have you ever asked anyone why they went to college?
No one ever does, so why ask someone why they didn't go to college?"
- Encounter
"Regretting the time that had gone by will bring you to tears.
You can't buy that time with money."
- Encounter
"Who doesn't have a painful memory or two?
We all fight through it and hide it. That's how everyone lives."
- He is Psychometric
"Even if life deceives you, don't be sad or angry.
Your heart lives in the future. The present is always sad.
Everything is momentary and will pass. And what passes will become precious in the future."
- While You Were Sleeping
"Words are born from people's mouths and die in their ears.
But some words don't die. They go into people's hearts and survive."
- Because This is My First Life
- A Korean Odyssey
There's nothing much to take away from this post. Just feel like sharing one new thing I learn - to create my own pace. Thanks for reading!
Dropping by,
Melynn.
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Your thoughts are much appreciated! TQ.